24 March 2009

An Open Letter to the nake in my backyard

Dear nake,

I have een you in the yard, lithering through the bu he and hi ing at me when I get too clo e. It' time for you to leave, plea e.



CC: Dell Computer , INC.

Dear Dell,

A certain letter on my keyboard no longer work . Plea e end replacement.

Thank ,



Carl said...

heRRo, hawn,

We are sorry you have troubre with your keyboard. We don't repRace keyboards. Prease get a new one from Best Buy.

Thank you.

DeRR Computer

JerseyGirl said...

i was asked to pass this on to you, sir.

dear shawn (notice that all of the keyssss on my mac are working jusssst fine - dell sssssucks),

i dont sssslither around your computer. maybe you should sssstay out of the bushesss.


dizzblnd said...


Shaking head

Heather Cherry said...



Heather Cherry said...

P.S. You have an award at my site.

Da Old Man said...

When you own a Dell computer, you learn to adapt. You need to get uzed to thingz not working az they zhould.
I have heard if you uze a zhovel, that zhould take care of the znake in your yard. Aim for the hizzing part, and whack away.

demarcusar said...

Thi i the hit, hawn!

Margo said...

Hawn, does your power cord stay plugged into the cpu? I've had two Hells and both of them had issues with this. Like one part was made in China and the other in India.

hawn said...

Carl: Dell better not ay anything of the ort!

Jer ey Girl: It would figure you would be friend with the nake. And it would figure that the nake would u e a Mac.

dizzblnd: omtime that all you can do.

Heather: An award for me?? weeet!

Da Old Man: Thank for the advice! I think my grandpa ha a hovel that will do the trick!

demarcu ar: Thank !

Margo: Thi i my fir t Dell and I haven't had that problem, no.

The Ssssssssssssnake said...

Sssssssssssssssssssuck it, losssssssssssser!

P.Sssssssss. I'm not leaving, assssssssshole.

Shawn said...

Ah, it's fixed itself.

When, um, did my comment section become a preferred place for roleplaying, I wonder...

Chris said...

More importantly ... did you kill the snake? I hate those little hiss machines.

Shawn said...

Chris: No! The snake lives, is angry, and has discovered my blog. Considering moving.

catherinette said...

An Open Letter to Shawn,

Guess what? It looks like I will be suing you as I was writing open letters way before you were.

Witness exhibit A!

That's it!! You'll be hearing from my attorney, who is a close personal friend of Judge Joe Brown and Judge Judy's.

Yours truly, Catherinette

Shawn said...

catherinette: A compelling argument. How-EVER, as I have explained to a certain other blogger who ALSO treads on this territory, I have been doing Open Letter posts since 1912. I hung them up in Thompson's Market. HNBC?

(That's How now, brown cow, if you aren't up with the lingo.)

Funnyrunner said...

I started just to write: "LLOL" because this made me laugh, and then I was treated to the inane string of comments which followed...lol

misskittykatt007 said...

oh--wow!!!!!!! what a trip!?!? have fun with it i guess???????

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