Driving along today, I came upon a delivery truck. On the back of this truck was one of those "How Is My Driving?" bumper stickers. This one was different, though. Below this was written "Complaints or Compliments--Call 1-800-[insert number here]". Complaints or compliments, eh? I wonder how many people go through the trouble of calling the number to put in a compliment on the guy's driving. I was only behind the truck for a brief period. He didn't make any flagrant violations of common traffic laws in this time, but I wouldn't say he impressed me enough to put in a call to his boss.
If the phone ever rings with a compliment at this guy's delivery company, I imagine the call goes something like this:
Delivery Company Secretary: We Deliver 2 U, How can I help you?
Caller: Yeah, I just wanted to call and tell you that I'm behind one of your trucks. I just felt compelled to say, this guy can DRIVE. He's like the Neo of delivery drivers!
Secretary: I see. What's his truck number?
Caller: 85621. Whoa!
Caller: He just turned onto 16th Street. He used both his turn signal and a hand signal to alert traffic that he was turning! I haven't seen that done since the Golden Age of the Automobile.
Secretary: (Sigh) Is this Bob?
Caller: (voice going slightly deeper) What? Who's Bob? I'm just a patriotic American who appreciates the fine driving I've just seen on display here today. I wish I had one of those camera phones, I would have recorded it and sold it as a driver's instruction video.
Secretary: Are you going to be able to make it back to the shop by 5, Bob?
Caller: Yeah, I've just got to drop off this last---er, I mean, I don't know what you're talking about. Goodbye!
as you wish
29 minutes ago