So it was just about a year ago when I decided I wanted tacos for dinner. Rather averse to subjecting myself to the flavors of Taco Bell, I chose to make them myself. I approached my wife and I said:
And she was like:
And so she left and about two hours later she came back and said:
And she handed me the meat and I examined it and was not pleased with what I saw:
And I made my feelings known:
And she was all:
But I was just like:
And so she's all:
But I'm still like:
And then she finally says:
Unfortunately, she was run over by an out-of-control rickshaw on her way back to the grocery store and died of internal injuries later than night. Instead of tacos, I had to settle for a bowl of Chef Boyardee Beefaroni. I'm still a little bitter about that to this day.
I'm Gonna Kill Santa Claus
3 years ago
20 comments:
I hope you sued. Unless of course it was a BP rickshaw, in which case you'll never find out who was really responsible.
LOL! That is just terrible! LOL!
Glad to see you back!
Oh there was a twist in this one. I though for sure mountain man husband was going to get upset about the all natural beef rather than the cheaper beef injected with hormones and other crap. I guess I'm getting too personal here, maybe projecting my life onto this subject matter... my bad. :)
No wonder you were gone so long!
Its probably a good thing that youd didnt eat that meat...it looks a little suspect to me. It seems your wife had gotten some of that bad meat, seeing how she is green and all.
Jeff: The owner of the rickshaw was never found. All that was left at the scene was a monogrammed handkerchief with the letters L.L. Mysterious.
Thinkin: It was terrible. Have you had that beefaroni?
Funnyrunner: Well, I do love unnatural hormones. Hmm, that didn't sound right...
Wendy: Nah, I was mostly over it the next day. Except when I burped.
Obladi: Good point. She did have a bit of a sickly pallor, now that you mention it. I never noticed before.
Wow. Nothing like having reasonable expectations.
And what did you keep feeding your wife to make her look so green around the gills?
Those rickshaw drivers are always out of control! They're also probably drunk and in this country illegally. Those bastards!!
Tacos can certainly be a point of contention in a marriage. That's all there is to it.
Heh, mountain man 'had a beef' with his old lady?
Quirky: Tacos, obv.
Foxy: I hate rickshaws and their drivers. They can all go straight to HELL. Nah, I don't care.
Eric: /instant rimshot
@Eric, that's what SHE said!
Anyway, massive beards and tacos should never meet. Just. Too. Messy.
Dude. It was only .01 pounds over, I think you're over-reacting a bit.
Ah, screw it, she's a damn witch. She deserved it.
BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
what a witch.
Marissa: Nonsense. That lets you enjoy the flavors long after the meal is over.
Chris: .01 pounds would have thrown off the entire recipe. You know, I shouldn't even have to explain this.
Candy: Hey! That's my dead wife.
Now wonder it's been awhile since we've seen you. It takes time to find the perfect taco.
George: And the search never really ends.
That is just terrible!
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You're in trouble.
-a.
Kanishk: Never forget, brother.
JG: Oops.
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